Crossbreed – USA, 2018

‘This is war’

Crossbreed is a 2018 American science fiction feature film directed by Brandon Slagle (House of Manson; The Black Dahlia Haunting; Dead Sea) from a screenplay co-written with Robert Thompson. The movie stars Stink Fisher, Daniel Baldwin, Vivica A. Fox and Vernon Wells.

Plot:

In the near future, the President of the New United States of America hires a team of military veterans to retrieve an alien bio-weapon from a top secret research facility orbiting the Earth.

The mission goes awry when it is revealed that the facility is being maintained by a double agent with allegiance both to the President as well as alien arms dealers.

Facing an immeasurable task, team leader Adam “Boss” Ryker must face not only the heavily-armed personnel guarding the facility, but also the alien biological weapon itself…

Review:

Loophole gave us a plot involving a satanic United Nations intent on world domination. Now, Crossbreed gives us that other staple of conspiracy theorists, The New World Order, and I don’t mean the wrestling clique either. Has InfoWars become the new source of inspiration for low budget screenwriters?

Crossbreed begins with bursts of text giving us a timeline for World War III. This is followed by the fall of the superpowers and the rise of The New World Order, and man’s eventual entry into interstellar trade.

The plot involves Adam ‘Boss’ Ryker (Stink Fisher) a former war hero now running a bar on the moon. He must have been a much better soldier than businessman as the bar is about to be foreclosed on. He’s visited by the US Secretary of Defense (Daniel Baldwin) on orders of President Henricksen (Vivica A. Fox). They need him to suit back up, put together a team and retrieve a life-form known as The Crossbreed seized by bio-terrorists. Of course, things don’t go as planned and The Crossbreed (Devanny Pinn) gets loose.

I don’t know where to start with Crossbreed. The script from director Brandon Slagle and Robert Thompson is, as you can see, a huge pile of cliches. It isn’t just the plot either, the execution is just as bad, terrible “tough guy” dialogue, the team member’s nicknames, the mission going wrong almost from the start, etc. It’s like every Dirty Dozen wannabe you’ve ever seen.

An early warning of what to expect turns up before the five minute mark. Badass mercenary Murphy (Vernon Wells) wraps a chain around his fist and punches some dude in the head. No, blood, no bruising, no marks of any kind, that would have cost too much.

The assorted communication devices and whatever other enhancements the crew sport look like plastic model pieces and sunglasses lens glued to their faces. Somebody is sliced up with a machete, there’s CGI blood flying everywhere. Yet we never see the body and the blade stays remarkably clean. That’s not low budget, that’s embarrassing.

Crossbreed allegedly has a $3.5 million budget. If that’s the case, it must have all gone on the CGI for the assorted spacecraft and the alien suit. They must have because they cheaped out on everything else.

Speaking of the alien, I’m a bit confused as to why Devanny Pinn was cast as the title creature. She’s a talented and good looking actress, but she gets to show none of that off in the creature suit. They could have cast any mime or stunt person, two fields that, as far as I know, she doesn’t have experience in. The other familiar names have maybe five minutes screen time. This leaves Crossbreed in the hands of an actor named Stink who looks like an out-of-shape Bill Goldberg (Santa’s Slay).

Crossbreed is the kind of film Fred Olen Ray and others like him churned out in the VHS era. Making this at least a decent diversion should have been a no brainer. Instead this is an attempt at a throwback that should indeed be thrown back.

Jim Morazzini, guest reviewer via Voices from the Balcony

Release:

Crossbreed is available from February 5th, 2019, on VOD from Uncork’d Entertainment.

Main cast:

  • Stink Fisher – The Lovely Bones
  • Daniel Baldwin – A Darker Reality; Vegas Vampires; John Carpenter’s Vampires; Attack of the 50 Ft. Woman (1998)
  • Vivica A. Fox – Independence Day
  • Vernon WellsLilith; Death House; Lighthouse Keeper; Cowboys vs. Dinosaurs; Jurassic City; Someone’s Knocking at the Door; Curse of the Forty-Niner
  • Devanny PinnDwelling; Dead Sea; Truth or Dare
  • Antoine Lanier
  • John T. Woods
  • Jason McNeil
  • Brandyn T. Williams
  • Jason John Beebe
  • Michael McIntyre

Filming locations:

  • Buffalo, New York
  • Laurel Canyon Stages – Arleta, Los Angeles, California

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